Yo! Like, dudes and dudettes! Chill! Don't be worryin' about that old fart bein' dead. Santa Cruz and his buddy Elf Dude have got th' situation under control. We got Christmas in the bag over here at the West Pole. Hell, me an' Elf Dude's about half in the bag too. Know what I mean?

All you Mudcattin' types been sendin' us them cards an' letters an' I been tryin' real hard to stay sober an' not screw up yer orders. Still gotta work a few things out though. Like lotsa you cats askin' fer geetars an' such get purty damn picky about whatcha want there. Dude, like, what's the dif between a SJ an' a OM? Don't they, like, both have six strings on 'em? An' them geetar strings! Jeezus H. Christ! Why they gotta make so many different ones? Maybe I need to hire a special helper just for you guys. Whoa! Dude! What a concept! Hire some cat that really knows his shit so I can go back to drinkin'!

An' I really need to get ridda these raindeer an' get some decent reliable transportation. Problem with raindeer is they don't fly worth a damn if it ain't rainin' an then all the shit gifts get wet.

We be seein' ya'll. Got any ideas fer who might won't that job?

Santa Cruz