My wife visits me in my dreams, very realistically. She always tries to comfort me, tells me that she is ok, kisses me, and leaves a peaceful feeling. Once she was walking fast and looked worried about something, and when I asked her where she was going, she only told me that everything was fine, and then I saw that she was going to my own funeral, but she was not crying.

My brain does not rewind and repeat old stories, feelings and circumstances. It presents to me (to all of us) new things, unseen, unheard of, unexpected. Why? Where are those images coming from? Are they the result of millions of connections in a neural network? Imagination is conscious, dreams are not.

These thoughts don't help to understand, but now I'm sure that when I die, my brain will not fail to me, and I will see her and go to her, at least for the last minute of semi-consciousness, and will feel that I meet her again. I'll not see any darkness. That will be enough.

I am grateful too, to all Mudcat friends for their support. I wish I could do something more for all of you.

Un abrazo,
Andrés