Neither of you should be required... or allowed to make decisions about treatment on behalf of another adult.
I work in the care of the dying...family conflict is very common... one son wants one thing... another wants something else... a third thinks they're both wrong... none of them has the right to decide.
Those closest to the patient should be kept informed...Their views will be sought... but decisions are the responsibility of the doctors... The law in the UK says one person CANNOT give consent on behalf of another adult... and the only person with any 'rights' is the patient. Even 'Advance Directives' are not legally binding... unless very specific...
who is your next of kin is most relevant when you die!!
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sj