This song is sometimes called "Cabbage head" in Appalachian versions. The version I know went something like this: I came home the other night as drunk as I could be I saw a hat sittin' on the table where my hat oughter be So I says to my wife, my pretty little wife, "Won't you tell me please What's this hat a-doin' here where my hat oughter be?" She said, "You blind fool, you drunken fool, Can't you never see? Why, that is only a bedpan that my mother gave to me." Well, I've traveled this wide world all over 'n some crazy things I've saw But a bedpan marked size seven and three-quarters I never seen before. It goes on to the horse in the stable, which she insists is a milk cow, and I forget what tips him off here, and then it eventually ends up in the bedroom, where the wife's lover is sleeping. She insists that her lover's head is a cabbage head, and I forget what kind of chaos from this ensues. But try searching DT for "cabbage head" and see where it takes you.
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