Re: The Spaniel

I stumbled across this thread (goodness knows if I'll ever find it again) and I do have the complete text for "The Spaniel". It's in "We're Still Using That Greasy MAD Stuff" (c)1959, 1963, E. C. Publications, Signet Q6499.

by Edgar, Al, & Moe

Once upon a midnight cautious, while I pondered weak and nauseous,
Over some advertising copy I had wrote for Macy's Store,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a yapping,
As of someone loudly yapping, yapping at my office door.
"'Tis some client there," I muttered, "yapping at my office door -
    Only this and nothing more."

Then I felt my terror worsen, for my guest was not a person!
In there stepped a cocker spaniel; naturally I jumped in fear.
Tried to climb an oaken panel, ripping there my new grey flannel;
But the spaniel merely stood there, speaking out with voice so clear -
Speaking out like Jack Lescoulie, in a voice both loud and clear -
    Quoth the spaniel- _"Drink Blatz Beer!"_

How I marveled this ungainly dog who did commercials plainly;
How he spoke the message clearly; selling points he underscored.
For I could not help agreeing that no living human being
Ever yet could mouth a slogan without sounding slightly bored -
    Quoth the spaniel: _"Buy a Ford!"_

Thus this dog with voice like Murrow made my heavy brow unfurrow;
Thoughts of fortunes I could make now made me shake down to my knees.
But the spaniel set me grieving then by turning tail and leaving.
Naturally, I begged him tarry, crying out, "Stay with me, please!"
    Quoth the spaniel, _"Eat Kraft Cheese!"_