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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
GUEST,Dan Lyr Req: Ten Little Bottles (14) Lyr Add: EIGHTEEN BOTTLES (Henry Morgan) 11 Nov 05


Here is the original bit.
          The Eighteen Bottles, by Henry Morgan
I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in my cellar and was told by my wife to empty the contents of each and every bottle down the sink, or else...
   I said I would and proceeded with the unpleasant task.
   I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and pured the contents down the sink with the exception of one glass, which I drank.
   I then withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which I drank.
   I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the whiskey down the sink which I drank.
   I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank.
   I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it, and threw the rest down the glass.
   I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle.
   Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink and drank the pour.
   When I had everything emptied, I steadied the house with one hand, counted the glasses, corks, bottles, and sinks with the other, which were twenty-nine, and as the houses came by I counted them again, and finally I had all the houses in one bottle, which I drank.
   I'm not under tha affluence of incohol as some tinkle peep I am.
   I'm not half as thunk as you might drink.
   I fool so feelish I don't know who is me, and the drunker I stand here, the longer I get.


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