Pictured above: As the final preparations get underway for Santa's Christmas Eve flight to deliver Jaze's present, his photographer visits the Reindeer Stables where the trusty steeds of the North Pole are kept. The posh facilities include a nose-polish manicure center for Rudolph, a ballet studio for Dancer, and anger-management classes for Donder and Blitzen. Here, the photog visits the Comet Cleanser, where he snapped this close-up of the disposal unit containing Comet's droppin... Okay, that does it. I quit this stupid photo-archiving job!! Sheesh, as if the crotch-shot wasn't bad enough, now they're sending me pictures of poop to write captions for. Well, obviously, Santa and his little North Pole "photog" are too busy fooling around with their camera to actually deliver Jaze's present, so I just went ahead and mailed it myself from down here in the States. If the package arrives by December 24th it'll be a Christmas miracle, but it is on its way. -- Santa's former photo archivist P.S. - By the way, Jaze, I'm not photographic (and whether I'm photogenic is debatable), but I'm definitely artistic. And I really am a former photo archivist. I guess you could say I'm "unusual", too; I was listed as "most mysterious" in my high-school yearbook. But I do not have the baby-blue eyes "pictured above" (or a long white beard, either -- that would be not only unusual but quite impossible). -- Your no-longer-silent Secret Santa
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