This one is not just about pissed-off people - but the eavesdropper got it literally ! EMPIRE HOTEL - by John Warner The eavesdropper gets his come-uppance. The tune is a variation on "The Farmer's Toast". (1994) Sung as question and response with male and female singer. Both: Early one morning I stood in Walhalla By the Empire Hotel at the break of the day. And somewhere upstairs there were two lovers talking, So softly I listened to what they did say. Man: "Why are you stirring, my darling, my dearie? It's dark even now and the moon sheds no beam." Woman: "I've just heard the footstep of Coker, the fireman, He's off to the minehead to start raising steam." "Why are you rising, my fine, lusty lover, Surely there's hours till the break of the day?" "Shake off the wine from your last night's carousing, And look through the window, the light it is gray." "Why are you dressing your warm, shapely body, Sliding up garters and lacing your stays?" "The room's to be cleaning, the bed's to be making, And both of us working like all other days." As the sun rose, I was still in Walhalla, Beside that hotel above cold Stringer's Creek, Charmed by the words of those two secret lovers, I drew even closer to where they did speak. "Where are my trousers, my boots and my jacket, Where is my wallet, you sour faced whore?" "Your wallet's right here till you've paid for your pleasure, Your clothes, where you led them right there on the floor." "The hooter is sounding, the skips will be rolling And soon the gold batteries will rattle the ground." "If you're late again, they will fire you this time If you're out of cash, then you needn't come round." "You're a slut! You're a thief, Christ, a man must be senseless To waste all his money on drink and a whore!" "An hour ago I was "darling" and "dearie" And I'll wager this evening you'll be back for more." "Well, here's thirty pieces of my hard earned silver, The last evening's money I'm wasting on you." "The loss is your own, of both silver and pleasure, If one man does not, many others can do." And when he had gone out the door in a flurry, She drew from the bedside her old chamber pot, Out of the window she emptied the contents, I was listening below and collected the lot. Hark to the eavesdropper cursing at morning, Don't sniff too long at his curious smell, But from his cruel fortune take heed and take warning Don't listen to lovers at the Empire Hotel.
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