The negative side:
I have occasionally had messages through Friends Reunited from people I was at school with, who were in the same class but were never particularly "best friends" : short messages, just saying hello and that they saw my name on there and asking what I'm doing these days. Each time, I've replied saying how nice to hear from you and briefly saying what I've been doing, family etc., and saying I'd be really interested to hear their news. . . and then I never get a reply. I think they are just being nosy, wanting to get the info on others but not really wanting to be in touch at all. Have any of you had the same thing happen ?

The positive side:
For the past 5 years or so, I have been back in touch with a lovely old boyfriend of mine who I first met in 1971, when I was still at school and he was at university. We'd always seen the world in the same way and got on like a house on fire. Neither of us had wanted to get seriously "involved" at that age and there was never any big split, we just lost touch. He then went to work in a university in the USA. I used to hear his news via a mutual friend, and I knew he always used to ask her about me. . . so, when I got my computer and looked him up on the university website, I knew I was on pretty safe ground in contacting him and that he would be glad to hear from me.

The great thing was that he rarely came back to the UK, but was due to be over here on a visit soon after I had emailed him, and we met up. It was quite extraordinary to see him again after all that time and, I know it's a cliche, but it really did feel as if we had only been speaking the week before, not decades before. We'd both been through very similar experiences in our lives and done similar things and, although there was, of course, a bit of reminiscing, what was great was that we talked much more about the "now".

He only occasionally comes back to the UK and so far we haven't been able to meet up again face to face, but have had some wonderful long talks on the phone. It is so good to be back in contact with someone who you feel to be on the same track as yourself. Without the internet, we would never have had that opportunity. We can go for months and months without contact, but that isn't what it's about. I don't know if anyone else will understand what I mean, but I know he would. I suppose it's what you might call friendship without a need, if that makes any sense. The way I see it, that is real friendship.

So . . . I would say there are fors and againsts with getting in touch with old friends on the internet. If you were true good friends, then you already know you have nothing to lose, and everything to gain by being with them again.

- jeanie