THE ARCHITECT
(Paddy Roberts)

Once there was an awful lot of nothing, just nothing,
No sun, no moon, no stars, no earth, no nothing, no nothing.
Then the great architect he planned and he planned,
And he gathered it together in the palm of his hand,
And a whole lot of nothing was turned into something,
The sea, and the sky, and the land.
It was just as he meant it to be,
So he said to himself, said he:

I need the birds for the air,
And the beasts for the fields,
And the fishes to swim in the sea.

The jellyfish, the cuttlefish, the lobster, and the whale,
The salmon and the sturgeon and the whiting,
Big fish with tentacles and stings in the tail,
And little fish with neon lighting,
The raven and the wren, and the little red hen,
And the cheeky little London sparrow,
The ostrich and the owl and the skinny guinea fowl,
And the robin that was shot with an arrow,
And of course,
The horse,
Of course.

The elephant, the buffalo, the badger and the beaver,
The camel with the look so refined,
The pekinese, the poodle-dog, the spaniel, the retriever,
The monkey with the little blue behind,
And they all lived together in perfect peace of mind.

He saw that ev'rything was 'cording to the plan,
But in no time at all the trouble all began
With that complicated, overrated, good-for-nothing creature
That is known as man.

Black man, white man, red man, yellow man,
Every man a-fightin' and a'-feudin' with his fellow man,
Nobody satisfied with his lot,
Everybody wantin' what he hasn't got.

Russians, Prussians, Japanese, Chinese,
Negroes, Dagoes, Yankees, Limeys,
Each one pullin' down his neighbours' fence.
That sort of thing just don't make sense.

'Cause some got brains; some got sinew.
That's the way that the world was planned.
Some get so that they can't continue.
All they need is a helping hand.

But one wants one, t'other wants t'other,
Pa 'gainst son and brother 'gainst brother,
Nobody knows what he's shoutin' for.
Ev'rybody's shoutin' for more and more and more,
And more,
And more.
What for?

Why don't they realise that once there was an awful lot of nothing,
Just nothing.