Oh wait, here's a good one:

SLAP 'ER DOWN AGAIN, PAW
As sung by Arthur Godfrey

Come here, gol-dern you!

Take that (*) and that (*) and that (* *)!

That's right...

CHORUS: Slap 'er down again, Pa; slap 'er down again.
Make 'er tell us more, Pa; tell us where she's been.
We don't want our neighbors talkin' 'bout our kin.
Slap 'er down again, Pa; slap 'er down again.

1. Well Pa and Ma were so dern sore they woke me up one night.
There was some awful cussin' and Ma said Pa was right.
They was awaitin' sister Bess who never kept her word.
The sun came up as Bess came in and this is what I heard:

CHORUS

2. Now poor old Bess got so dern mad she ran away one day
To meet that travelin' salesman with city-slickin' ways.
We ran and stood beside the road with shotguns by our side.
Me and Deke and Pa and Ma who yelled as they came by:

Why don't you... (CHORUS)

3. Now Ma and Pa, they planned for Bess to marry Deacon Brown
And not that travelin' salesman who always came around.
They made poor Bessie go to church; her face was mighty red.
The deacon took one look at her and this is what he said:

Oh... (CHORUS)

Doe-si-doe!

Boy that's hot stuff, ain't it?

4. Well, the moral of this story, girls, is don't stay out too late
Unless you take your shoes off outside your pappy's gate.
If Ma don't hear you comin' in, she won't lay down the law,
And you won't have to worry 'cause you won't sing out to Pa.

Oh... (CHORUS)

Take that (*) and that (*) and that (* *)!

[* = Sound of a slap.]