I really must stop these puerile parodies; but I keep coming across the same character, in different clothes, at different sessions, murdering different songs, be it Athenry, No man's land, Yellow on the Broom, W.M.Thyme, Star o' the C.D., etc.

JIM McDIRGE

Copyright 31/10/00, Rob Maxtone Graham.

Now, his name's Jim McDirge,
He can nae haud a tune,
An' a dronin' auld sang he will air.

So be canny and leave,
When he starts up his wheeze;
He's a man tae avoid onywhere.

Wi' his acres o' lard,
He thinks he's a Bard,
But his beer gut, it reaches the flair.

He says "Come a' ye,
sing Jock Stewart wi' me;
It's easy - I'll show ye first"

Well he wails wi' pure doom,
An' ye hope tha' richt soon,
He'll struggle tae find the next verse.

Sae ye tak oot yer gun,
And say "Sing just one
mair line o' tha', if ye dare!"

But he carries on gaun,
First faster, then slowin'
An' things go frae bad tae worse.

Sae come powder yer charge;
Number 6 shot hits hard.
Jim McDirge, yer gaun hame in a hearse.

Rob