Well, that's kind of a simplistic analysis, that they banned contraception and then ever since kids died of starvation. But then, if you don't use a name when you post, you don't have to be responsible for what you say - do you?

But then, that's the deal with anonymity - the cowards who post without names can insult and make their rash generalizations with impunity.

The truth of the matter, I believe, is more complex. Certainly, not every Catholic family has too many children, but every Catholic parish seems to have one or more families with phenomenal numbers of children. The mothers most often are sad and miserable, and usually seem to attend church with all the children but not the father (funny thing that, isn't it?). And oftentimes, the fathers of these megafamilies never seem to be around to participate in caring for the children - that's up to the mothers and the older daughters.

It's hard to understand these Catholic megafamilies, and I've tried hard to reach out to them and find out what makes them what they are. When I was a kid in Wisconsin, we had one family in the parish with 17 kids. After that was the family of a rich Irish-American attorney who had six kids, and then my family had five (and we could afford five). Now, I have to say that the kids in the 17-child family seemed to be happy and intelligent, and two of them were good friends of mine. I didn't know the parents at all, but the children seemed fine.

And to be totally honest, I have to say I can't imagine why my mother had five children. She was a brilliant woman, and she wasn't the kind of person who would blindly follow orders from anyone, but nonetheless she had five kids and seemed to be very unhappy being a mother. I never figured that out, and I'm glad I moved out of the house and went to the seminary at the age of 13.

I was in an urban parish in California 1980-2002, and there was only one megafamily in the parish. I'd see them only rarely, but they'd always be there on Good Friday, which is the one day of the Catholic Church year that is all about suffering. The mother looked Irish, and she was in her late 30s, and had too many runny-nosed children to count. I think the oldest child was about eight. No father on the scene - not ever. I don't know what to think of this family. It's clear that they took the prohibition against birth control very literally. The priest didn't know what to do with them - they were in a shell and didn't have conversation with anybody, even the priest.

Now I'm in a very large semi-rural parish, and we have two mega-families. We also have two or three wealthy, educated families with six children, but I think many of those children are adopted - the parents seem to be social workers, not miserable slaves to birth control regulations. But we have two families that fit the conservative megafamily mold. One family with eight children came from a born-again church and the entire family converted to Catholicism at once. I know that family very well because most of the children are musicians. They're conservative, but gee, they're wonderful. I have to say that those parents are doing a wonderful job of raising their kids.

The other family fits the stereotype closer, although the mother is college-educated and may be more capable and educated than the father. She's brilliant and attractive and capable and well-educated, but she can't use any of her capabilities because she has so many children to care for and her husband is off at work all the time. And she seems to be pregnant and miserable all the time - I really don't know how many kids they have now. They're very conservative, and they seem to be tied to the most conservative Catholic movements in the area. The husband is a very nice person, fun to talk with, and seems to have fun with the kids - he doesn't seem to display the miserable martyr attitude the wife has. So, I can't figure this whole thing out.

So, in my almost 66 years as a very active Catholic and a catechist, I have known four of these stereotypical conservative Catholic megafamilies. Two of those families seemed to be happy and healthy, and two seemed to be severely dysfunctional.

There's so much about those megafamilies that I'd like to know, but they're really hard to understand. I suppose such families are more common in Ireland, but I have no idea how common they are. They are a rarity in Catholic parishes in the U.S., but they certainly are an interesting phenomenon.

Oh - one more thing I was going to mention: in general, the megafamilies do not send their children to the parish for religious education. As a religious educator, this drives me crazy, but apparently the megafamilies do not think the parish provides religious education that is sufficiently orthodox.

-Joe-

Putting my moderator hat on, allow me to say that I will most probably move this thread below the line if it engenders much discussion that doesn't have to do with music.
-Joe-