Hahaha Joe, you could try it!

Actually I find these modern disembodied voices a bit creepy. There's a lift down from the car park we use in Norwich, and 'the voice' says "Doors closing!" and "Doors opening!" I realise it's a great help to blind folk, but we don't enjoy it. My husband always feels compelled to talk back at her. "Shut up, you are a very silly lady!"
She's rather posh, but at the main hospital the lift doors have a very Cockney lady's voice. "Dohs owpenin'!" My husband says, "Go back to London, robot woman!" He also politely thanks the automatic checkout voice in Tesco. "Don't forget your receipt!" "Thank you so much, eeets very very kind off yoo!"
I sometimes think I'm going completely mad...