Didn't think I would be back kind of lost heart after Dauvit passed but it is a rough time and I took a wander through the thread it made me think of the sunshine I have started to rebuild. A while back i stumbled on a photography group by accident (Pudgy fingers and wee keys :) )Some of the photgraphs are amazing "I couldn't do that" but at the top of the page was the weekend theme which was the colour blue. My world had been shrinking till other than shopping i rarely went out the house but I suddenly found myself grabbing the camera I had bought Dauvit for our silver wedding which had lain unused and headed to town. There was a tiny cafe up the Strynd that had an old welsh dresser painted a lovely pale blue on which they displayed their cakes. I had coffee then asked the staff if they would mind me taking a picture of the dresser. They probably thought I was mad but happily agreed so I took my picture and scuttled of home. Taking what courage i had in my fingertips i pressed the post button and there among the amazing pictures was my wee picture. If someone had slammed it I would probably have curled up and gone back to my isolation. That however was not what happened Mark the founder of the group said it was nice and others added positive comments encouraging me to go take more photographs. Gradually starting with isolated places i did not think i would see people I went out with the camera. What i came to realise was having a camera round your neck was rather like a baby in a pram or a puppy it attracts people, they smile and talk about taking pictures and where to go. Several weeks later someone critisised someone elses picture and I found myself tellting them of since a group rule was no creative critisism unless asked for. Mark spotted it and a bit later I was asked to join the admin team. That summer there was hardly a day that i was not out somewhere taking pictures and talking to more and more people. Fast forward to last November my brother broke the neck of his hip. I drove down to be with him and with one set back and another i didnt see home till the begining of April. I realised at 83 he is becoming very frail but fiercely independant. To help him regain his confidence and learn to walk with a walking stick I took him out almost every day and took lots of pictures of the places we went most photo bombed by Roy who is to deaf to hear my shout :) . sadly I was only home a few weeks when he ended up back in hospital and i had to rush down again. Once more we started the going out until he was confident enough to spend a bit of time on his own as i strolled back to the car for a seat. One thing I realised was we were so comfortable that we were not making new memories so we started looking for places we had never been and had some wonderful visits and pictures. And i have lots of lovely new and happy memories to keep me warm when it is his time to go.
|