Pg. 386, Barnyard Folklore of Southeastern Idao by James Kenneth Larson.

OF ALL THE BEASTS
St. John, Idaho, 1918(?)

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the cow;
I'd stand upon my two hind legs
And show the old bull how!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields
I'd rather be the bull;
I'd stand upon my two hind legs
And pump the old cow full!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the dog;
I'd lift my hind leg in the air
And piss on every log!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the cat;
I'd shit in every pile of dirt
And smooth the place out flat!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the whale;
I'd swim the whole world over
To find a piece of tail!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the bird;
I'd fly down on some woman's hat
And shit a juicy tird!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the buck;
I'd climb upon the old ewys back
And fuck and fuck and fuck!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the mare;
I'd back right up, and lift my tail,
And show the old stud where!

Of all the beasts that roam the field,
I'd rather be the sow;
I'd streton my belley on the grass
And let the old boar plow!

Of all the beasts that roam the fields,
I'd rather be the skunk;
I'd piss on every passer-by
To show him how I stunk!

Of all the beasts that roam the field,
I'd rather be the goat;
I'd steal my master's underwear
And cram them down my throat!

Of all the beasts that roam the field,
I'd rather be a man;
And then I'd get it whole lot oftener
Than the other animals can!