We used to bandy this song about when I was in the Navy. It is very close to the Oscar Brand version.

As I went down to the Chandler's shop some candles for to buy,
Twas not a sign of the Chandler or his wife did I espy.
Well I was disappointed and some angry words I said,
Then I heard the sound of a (rap-tap-tap) right above my head.
I heard the sound of a (rap-tap-tap right) above my head.

Now I was slick and I was quick so up the stairs I sped,
And very surprised was I to find the Chandler's wife in bed.
There with her was a fine young man of quite considerable size,
And they were having a (rap-tap-tap) right before my eyes.
Yes, they were having a (rap-tap-tap) right before my eyes.

Aah, when the fun was over and done she lifted up her head,
And very surprised was she to find me standing by the bed.
Said she, if you're discrete my boy, if you would be so kind,
You too can come up for some (rap-tap-tap) whenever you feel inclined.
Yes, You can come up for some (rap-tap-tap) whenever you feel inclined.

Now all you married men TAKE HEED! whenever you go to town,
If you must leave your woman alone be sure to tie her down.
But if you would be kind to her just lay her right down on the floor,
And give her so much of that (rap-tap-tap) she doesn't want any more.
Yes, give her so much of that (rap-tap-tap) she doesn't want any more.