I am 75 years old and have been married (to the same woman)for 52 years. Believe me, I know about 'bones of contention'. Life is awash with injustices.

I guess it makes a difference who the person is that you are currently at odds with. Several years ago my wife and I were told by our son and daughter-in-law not to have anything further to do with our grandchildren, their children. It tore our guts apart. I thought there was no deeper dispair that I would ever feel. The sleepless nights became an unending nightmare.

My wife and I simply did not acknowledge the pain we felt. We never raised our voice about the issue, and in all other matters we maintained a loving and caring posture. After all, we did love our son and his wife, as well as our grandchildren.

We have a wonderful relationship with all of them now. My two grandsons and my granddaughter are well adjusted, happy, caring young adults, married or about to be so. The entire extended family shares in the happiness of the others. If my wife or I had reacted to my son's wrongheaded edict in anger, that would not be the case. The family could have been torn apart by unending recrimination.

I guess it makes a difference who the person is who brings about your anger and your pain, and how their relationship with you bears on your future happiness. You didn't share those things, so I can't say how you should respond to the other person's actions. Believe me, there are lots of scenarios where I would suggest anything from calling the cops to hiring a lawyer or simply chalking the relationship off. You have to decide. Just remember, life and its relationships are to be cherished, not decried.

Spud