Well, I guess whin(ge)ing (note the bilingual/bihemispheric spelling) sonoger-singwriter songs are my least favorite "topic," but what really gets me is ones with the typical new-age (rhymes with s....) topics of sensitive men, strong women, urban legends and lower taxes that aren't even crafted well. There was one local songstress with a song about the Baltimore-Washington Parkway that used to set my teeth on edge (she insisted on singing it) because it had this damnedly-poor meter to the chorus.

Of course, some friends and I couldn't leave well-enough alone, giving rise to this:

I Feel, I Feel


I feel I should tell you how I feel, I feel it's important to you.
I'd like to share my inner self; you must listen while I do.
My ruminations solipsistic
You might perceive as narcissistic,
But I think they're mystic --
Don't you? Don't you? Don't you?
-- Of course you do.

I feel the pain of every bite, and I feel you should, too.
I bear the stain of every slight -- I'll show them all to you.
These deliberations so dramatic
From my hidden-horrored mental attic
I prefer to spoken social static --
Don't you? Don't you? Don't you?
-- Of course you do.

Oh, I have so much to say, I cannot think of a better way
Than to offer you my song today, and tomorrow, too.
I really feel you'll understand, it's all within a master plan,
You can believe, I know you can, and feel the way I do
....Be do be do...

I feel so in touch with my feelings at last; come walk a mile in my shoes.
I'll show you the place where I keep my face, in a case with a trace of the blues.
I bring these thoughts to you tonight,
My intellect is my delight,
I think I'm captivating, quite!
Don't you? Don't you? Don't you?
-- Of course you do.

Oh, I have so much to say, I cannot think of a better way
Than to offer you my song today, and tomorrow, too.
I really feel you'll understand, we're all part of a mystic plan,
So reach out for my grasping hand, and feel the way I do
.... Be do be do...

Since childhood days I knew I had the strongest tendency
Toward tuning in the universe, and sensitivity --
These gifts I know are very rare,
I think I've got so much to share --
And modesty beyond compare,
Don't you? Don't you? Don't you?
-- Of course you do!


Copyright ©1996, Bob Clayton, Pete Kraemer, Joan Sprung. All Rights Reserved