What a fun subject! It's always a hoot writing about poopie!

- Al

COFFEE BEANS!
To the tune of "Shaving Cream" by Benny Bell
New Words by Al Boyce 6/28/2001

I have a sad story to tell you.
It may hurt your feelings a bit.
Last evening I read in the headlines,
They're now making coffee from...

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COFFEE BEANS!
With sugar and cream
Drink coffee each day
And you'll always feel keen!

In South Vietnam there's a civet
Who's diet is queer, I'll admit
It dines only on coffee cherries,
And the beans then come out in its...

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These civet beans then are collected
From where these civets stop and sit
Then they're brewed up into "Kopi Luwak"
But they still taste to me just like...

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They charged me three C-Notes for Luwak
So I thought with my neighbor I'd split
But in Mocha, Espresso or Latte
That Luwak still smelled just like...

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So I brought Luwak to the Church Social
All brewed up in my picnic kit
When I served up a cup to the Pastor
He said, "God D*mn this cup of ..."

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So how should we drink Luwak coffee?
Just like KUDU DUNG, should we spit?
Or, just like a curse to a rival -
But instead of EAT, say "GO DRINK...."

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And now, 'Cats, this parody's ended.
I think Luwak drink makers should quit.
To protest, stick your arse in a Starbuck's
And leave them your OWN pile of...