THE RESTROOM DOOR SAID 'GENTLEMEN'
As recorded by Bob Rivers on "Twisted Christmas"

The restroom door said 'Gentlemen' so I just walked inside.
I took two steps and realized I'd been taken for a ride.
I heard high voices, turned and found the place was occupied
By two nuns, three old ladies and a nurse.
What could be worse
Than two nuns, three old ladies and a nurse?

The restroom door said 'Gentlemen'; it must have been a gag.
As soon as I walked in there, I ran into some old hag.
She sprayed me with a can of mace and sacked me with her bag.
I could tell this just wouldn't be my day.
What can I say?
It just wasn't turning out to be my day.

The restroom door said 'Gentlemen' and I would like to find
The crummy little creep who had the nerve to switch the sign,
'Cause I've got two black eyes and one high heel up my behind.
Now I can't sit in comfort and joy.
Boy, oh, boy!
Now I'll never sit in comfort and joy.