Finally this thread needs some sense!! I work for a power company, so in lieu of Yorkshire, I am just the man to put you all right on the mathematics of this!

I read once that a human can put out about 100 watts of power for a while (and while we are at it, let's get the watts jokes out of the way - "what, what, what, what - I say, only four watts, he is not very bright!!").

Assuming a hampster is about one hundredth of a human in power output (we will need to redefine horsepower (hp) here, because we could get confused with human power (hp) or hampster power (hp) - let's assume a hampster (hp) is one watt (definitely not very bright!).

To generate enough electricity to supply the USA, you would need about 600 billion hampsters (i.e., 600 thousand million). I tried to work out how much feed this many hampsters would need, but my calculator went on strike, and the answer was either 4 million cubic acres per hour (i.e., 2 million of Uncle Scrooge's money bins full of feed) or something the size of Venus. I tried to check this calculation using pen and paper, but I ran out of paper.

However, I can confidently predict that there isn't enough food on earth to feed this lot, but if you could the by-products would truly awe - inspiring. And the support industries - breeding replacements, funerals and burial of 200 billion hampsters per annum. (Come to think of it, the funeral notices would get a bit repetitive, wouldn't they?) The mind boggles! Imagine if they all farted at once - you would knock the Earth out of orbit!

By the way, are there any songs about hampsters?

Regards Chris