And just in case anyone was wondering about the two last verses of "Seven Drunken Nights"....
As I came home on Saturday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw an arse up in the air, where my auld arse should be.
I called me wife and I said to her, "Would you kindly tell to me:
Who owns that arse up in the air, where my auld arse should be?"
“Ah! You're drunk, you're drunk, you silly auld fool! Still you cannot see!
That's a lovely pumpkin that me mother sent to me.”
Well, it's many a day I've traveled, a hundred miles or more,
But a pumpkin quite as smooth as that sure I never saw before.
And as I came home on Sunday night, as sober as could be,
I saw a thing in my wife's thing, where my auld thing should be.
So I walked up to the mantelpiece, took down the auld twelve-bore,
And you never saw two dirty bastards run so fast before!
-H
HTML line breaks added. --JoeClone, 4-Feb-02.