Some questions are just impossible to answer despite all one's knowledge. The last post was to cover these queries.

Dear Mr Latimer,

Piano and guitar metronomes are not suitable for 5-string banjo. You will need to purchase an electronic one with built-in anti-frailure protection. I can supply a suitable model at a competitive price.

Dear Ebbie,

I believe your problem is that you have been sold a German metro gnome. These are, indeed, rather unreliable at keeping good time. I would suggest that you place this as an attractive ornament in your garden and keep time by tapping your foot instead. In this manner, you will be able to speed up or slow down during a song or tune as you see fit.

Yours sincerely,

Dr. Guitar