Deer Dr Giutar,

I am traveling several weeks now with my hardrock group Der Gotterdammerungers and I am having trouble with my groupees who are making me to smash my faching Stratocaster. This is happening as this : I am getting on the stage fine and playing in a normal rockstar manner undtil my group plays our big hit Swinging the Hamer of Thor. I am trying to be calm, but my groupees are taking thier bras from their boozums and calling "Swing your hammer Mighty Thor!" This is what makes me break my giutar on top of the stage.

I am buying the cheaper and cheaper Strats, first the Eric Clapton model, then Eddie Van Halen, then the Neil Diamond and finally a crummy Snooks Mackenzie model. I am saving the peices and assembeling a guitar before each show.

How you could help me with this problem? Don't ask I should not break my instroment, because I'm needing these groupees to control my acne problem.

"Mighty" Thor Hotel Cramloch Stertnees, Scotland