Dear Mr A. Nutt,

Your solution is an inventive one but, sadly, flawed I am afraid to say. First of all, there is no known source of used plutonium. All plutonium in its various varieties is made freshly to order in nuclear plants.

A second problem would be the risks generated, apart from the annoying and ethically unacceptable toxic hazard to your audience and other innocent bystanders, the weak alpha radiation could have a potentially deleterious effect on the fine polymeric finish of your guitar (or viola?...I am not sure which you own from your letter). Thirdly you yourself might mistake it for the talcum powder you probably use for playing blues guitar (or viola) and contaminate your own physical person. Fourthly, can you begin to imagine the disastrous consequences should you decide to form an ensemble with similar-minded musicians.

I have a proposal. Why not separate out the plutonium 241. If you store this safely for 14 years, half of it will have decayed to a gram or so of americium-241 which will give you a unique opportunity to establish a potentially profitable and ethically acceptable smoke detector business.

If you really must go ahead with this scheme despite my advice, procure a small amount of the heaviest form of Pu which has a half life of approximately 37600 years. If you place this within your guitar case it should deter anybody, even yourself, from going near.

As for the remaining Pu, I am at a loss as to where you might store it but perhaps some of our resident physicists may be able to help with suggestions.

However, all of this is purely hypothetical since you seem to be safely locked away for the protection of society! But I have nevertheless alerted the authorities just to be on the safe side and I am led to believe that Mrs Nutt is currently helping them with their enquiries!

Yours sincerely,

Dr. Guitar