Dear Confused in the Mid-West USA,

Your post raises not just one but several interesting points!

Since your friend seems a reluctant student, it seems futile to waste an enormous $500 on such an instrument which could clearly damage her fingernails further causing the kind of social exclusion that Alona Lott has suffered. If, indeed, she has gone ahead with this fruitless purchase I recommend that you ask her to forward this old "Gibson" to me as I have the necessary facilities to dispose of it safely and free of charge.

Is your friend handy? I ask this because it is not strictly necessary for a guitar to have strings and this could solve her fingernail problems and, indeed owning long fingernails could be a positive advantage in constructing her own very special guitar. Here is a site which explains how. Is your friend prepared to wear short trousers and do a funny walk as well as these qualities would also add to the ownership pleasure of such an instrument.

A build-it-yourself guitar that won't hurt your fingers or damage your fingernails

Since your friend appears to be a "reluctant student", your "Learn to play guitar while you sleep" tapes risk not being appreciated. However your generosity should in some way be rewarded and, since Alona Lott does not know where to put her fingers, I cannot but help think that your singular act of kindness could contribute towards a partial cure of her malady.

Yours sincerely,

Dr. Guitar