"Well, this is way too much folk music and housecleaning for one day" she thought. She clicked on her laptop to check her investments. "Damn hedge fund!" she murmured to herself, relaizing that she'd be getting another margin call from the nefarious Charles O'Schwab, that seedy investment banker and waterfront crimp. "Maybe I'll be shanghaied and sent around the horn again" she thought. She hates it when that happens.

But then she gazed out of the window at the harbor and saw a strange sailing craft looming into port. She opened her window, and heard a wafting noise that sounded hideously obscene (something about a Hanging Johnny).

She could no longer contained herself. She that she had to...