I would still like to keep this thread from sliding away. Allison will be in shock and mourning right now, and may not be able to post often, but I would like to see the thread available to her when she can, so let's keep it up.

I find that even five years later (next January 28th), I want to sit and mourn my daughter because it is the only way I can feel close to her now. Sometimes I look at pictures of her, but that doesn't work as well as just bringing her into my mind, as the pictures are now frozen in time. Grieving, which brings me close to her again, is so important, because I miss her desperately, and am going through life with a huge ache.

That's not every day, of course, and I don't want Allison to think that the grief doesn't lessen. I laugh, dance, sing (badly), and take all that life offers. But sometimes I have to stop and be close to her again for a while.