We do not know if any of you live in Labrador, but if you do please note that it is beginning to drift. This is not part of the "Continental Drift" on tectonic plates, but rather due to the fact that the connection between the surface and the subsurface rocks has been severed, mostly likely by mischevious kobolds as a prank. We expect the drift to occur with the next few weeks.

Except for some danger to shipping (and the captains should really be able to see Labrador drifting towards them long before it becomes a danger), there should be no problems. Unless, of course, it is suddenly broken loose by a storm, heavy traffic, a breeze, heavy sneezing, or too many people flushing at the same time. In this situation we cannot predict with any accuracy the speed or direction of Labrador. Our best guesses are that it will collide, violently, with one or more of these: Iceland, Nunavit, Ireland, the Shetlands, the Orkneys, Massa..Masach..Cape Cod, or Florida; there are outside chances for collisions with British Columbia, Paraguay, and Aduk.

So, if you happen to see Lucy, we'd appreciate knowing where she's gotten to. She a black Labrador Retriever, and large, very, very large. And she likes to be scratched right behind her ears.

Thank you for your assistance.