Some vets will come to your home so your dog can skip the "I HATE vets" panic as their last outing with you. You could ask them to give you a tablet form of sedation to administer at home, if what you want is for Maggie just to fall asleep in your lap, and then the vet could come along at an arranged time and complete the process by injection.

Some folks shoot old dogs. Life in the farm country is rough.... I've had to shoot an injured and suffering duck, and I've drowned a few crippled chicks, too, and oh my GOD it was awful. Hardi has put down cats, bats, skunks, and so forth by pistol, racquet, and arrow, at various times, and he reports it being quite grimly sad as well.

I also did some injection euth myself once-- a farmfull of diseased cats and rabbits when I took over the farm section of an outdoor ed facility. I did a rabbit myself via heart injection; it was grim enough that I decided to ask the vet to visit himself, for the rest of the culling, and we did it together. I caught and held, he injected and bagged. It was still grim, but much better not done alone.

"Grim" does not necessarily mean "icky." But it goes against the grain to take life, even when logic and stewardly love require it. No matter how humane, it's not a thing to do inhumanly-- i.e., alone.

Please, do not do this alone. Get some help and if it's the right help, they will know how to involve you so you can feel right about seeing to it. Believe me you will feel equally "responsible" no matter who pushes the plunger.

~Susan