Lorna Doones, named after an imaginary heroine created by Sir Walter Scott, are   sweet shortbread squares which come from the great American Nabisco Company; who in turn are probably responsible for more overweight grade-schoolers than any other American institution. Lorna Doones are delicious, being full of fat and sugar and not much else. They do not have frosting, however, nor are they coated with chocolate. In this way they represent the austerity and simplicity associated with the mythic image of the Scots people, who earned it. American children therefore end up thinking that eating Lorna Doones is an ascetic adventure which will make them canny, lean, competent with large swords, and niggardly. All that actually happens is the gaining of weight.

This in turn stimulates the market as parents feel obliged to purchase new clothes over and over for their offspring because of those damn cookies.

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