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AND HER MOTHER CAME TOO!
(Words, Dion Titheradge. Music, Ivor Novello. ©1921)

I seem to be the victim of a cruel jest.
It dogs my footsteps with the girl I love the best.
She's just the sweetest thing that I have ever known,
But still we never get the chance to be alone.

My car will meet her,
    And her mother comes too!
It's a two-seater.
    Still her mother comes too!
At Ciro's when I am free,
At dinner, supper or tea,
She loves to shimmy with me,
    And her mother does too!

We buy her trousseau,
    And her mother comes too!
Asked not to do so,
    Still her mother comes too!
She simply can't take a snub;
I go and sulk at the club,
Then have a bath and a rub,
    And her brother comes too!

There may be times when couples need a chaperone,
But mothers ought to learn to leave a chap alone.
I wish they'd have a heart and use their common sense,
For three's a crowd, and more, it's treble the expense.

We lunch at Maxim's,
    And her mother comes too!
How large a snack seems
    When her mother comes too!
And when they're visiting me,
We finish afternoon tea,
She likes to sit on my knee,
    And her mother does too!

To golf we started,
    And her mother came too!
Three bags I carted,
    When her mother came too!
She fainted just off the tee,
My darling whispered to me,
"Jack, dear, at last we are free!"
    But her mother came to!