Ah, yes... The decoder ring...

Well, Amos, regretfully, I cannot send you a decoder ring. You see, there are only three sources for Official MOAB BS Decoder Rings.

The first is the navel of Holy Trinity of BS member Britney Spears. The second is the left nipple of Holy Trinity of BS member Barbara Streisand. And the third is the member of Holy Trinity of BS member Bill Shatner (the real one).   

Official MOAB BS Decoder Rings carry a tremendous charge of Psi and Chi and other New Age BS type stuff so the members of the Holy Trinity of BS are extremely reluctant to part with them. I got mine by posing as a hotel custodian and snagging Ms Spears' ring from a bedside table while she was in the Jaccuzi. Little Hawk and khandu got theirs by having sex with Ms Streisand and Mr. Shatner, though it's not exactly clear who had sex with whom, whether any parties involved achieved orgasm or if money changed hands.

I'm sure that all three Holy Trinity of BS members have new rings by now, so, if you really want one, just decide who you would most like to bang and go for it.