We made a wonderful discovery the other night in the Six Bells in Barrow. We were all playing away, like you do in pubs, and when the music went a bit flat for a while, one of the lads whipped out a theorem, and gave us a blast. Well, it seemed one of the others knew this theme, and joined in, and before you could say Kim Howells, there were six of us jabbering away. I'm sad to say that some contributors were pretty poor, and perhaps they should have practised in their bedrooms for a few more years before expounding to an entire pub, but they did their best to keep up.

The regulars loved it! They were whooping and hollering at every new twist to the debate, and the craic was so hot we talked for the rest of the evening, with narry a gap between speakers you could've slid a quaver in.

It wasn't all Wordsworth, I can tell you. The poor landlady was beside herself that we were engaging openly in public entertainment with more than two speakers holding forth at the same time. Naturally, talk turned to licensing of such activities. This sort of extreme debating will soon come to the attention of local government busybodies, so the idea of self regulation was floated. Due to the occasionally poor standard of performance, entry standards should be imposed, and at least a Grade Five qualification would largely stamp out contributions from the populist press from ill-versed half-wits who reckon anyone can pick up a debate and belt out a hypothesis.

It isn't for everyone though, and some of the musicians present did get up and leave when the talking started, but then the pub started to fill up when passing trade heard the craic. No doubt there will be some backlash next week, and it'll be back to playing the same old tunes, but it was surprising to see how quickly the pub filled up when there was something worth listening to.