it was a dark and muddy night
as i lay in my hospital cell
the sign on my bed said Dave Bryant
there was a grim, malodorous smell..

the ward was a ribbon of flurolight
shedding on lousy floors
and the men in white coats came riding,
riding riding
the men in white coats came riding
up to my bedroom door

they'd a stethoscope bright at their jacket
Nurse Ratched was standing on by
they watched while i coughed up n hacked it
she fixed me with her malevolent eye

they ticked a few forms and they muttered
and mumbled, as they walked right on by
but Nurse Ratched replied, listen Bryant
I'll be back with the metho soon Bryant
back with the metho and needle
and she laughed as she swaggered on by...

She'd a white starched hat on her forehead
A bunch of old keys at her side
A dowdy and spotless white uniform
and a chuckle like Frankenstein's bride

And she strode with a bottle of metho,
and sponged that bottle of metho,
sponged that burning metho
Onto Dave Bryant's backside

while Dave screamed and grabbed at his morphine
Nurse Ratched leant over and said
Behave now, Bryant or I'll get you
And your bedsores will soon be bright red

She slapped our young Dave to submission
And beat the young man to a pulp
Over the lino she clattered
Like a medical Incredible Hulk

…And still of a winter's night, they say,
when Dave Bryant is clutching his knees,
When the ward is a Mudcat asylum
full of unrest & disease,
When the ward is a ribbon of flurolight over the sanitised floor,
Nurse Ratched comes a striding, striding, striding
Nurse Ratched comes a striding, along the linoleum floor..

Alfred Annoyes