The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #67283   Message #1123628
Posted By: Eugene Judge
25-Feb-04 - 02:09 PM
Thread Name: Lyr Req: Unified Field Theory
Subject: Lyr Add: UNIFIED FIELD THEORY
Found these at this site

http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/old89/relativity.858.html

^^
UNIFIED FIELD THEORY

In the Beginning there was Aristotle,
and objects at rest tended to remain at rest,
and objects in motion tended to come to rest,
and soon everything was at rest,
and God saw that it was boring.

Then God created Newton;
objects at rest tended to remain at rest,
but objects in motion tended to remain in motion,
and energy was conserved
and momentum was conserved
and matter was conserved,
and God saw that it was conservative.

Then God created Einstein,
and everything was relative,
and fast things became short,
and straight things became curved,
and the universe was filled with inertial frames,
and God saw that it was relatively general
but some of it was especially relative.

Then God created Bohr,
and there was the Principle,
and the Principle was Quantum,
and all things were quantified,
but some things were still relative,
and God saw that it was confusing.

Then God was going to create Furgeson,
and Furgeson would have unified,
and he would have fielded a theory,
and All would have been One,
but it was the Seventh Day
and God rested,
and objects at rest tend to remain at rest.

[Reportedly appeared in Analog Magazine in 1975. Unknown if that is the original source.]