There was an old character here who owned a gas station and sold such necessities as cigarettes and condoms. A guy from away came in, bought a pack of cigarettes, and started to light up. The old guy says, no smoking here please. The guy got irritated and said "I bought them here, why can't I smoke them here"?
Old fella says, "You by laxitive in the drug store, you don't shit on their floor."