Hi crew. I could use some advice.
There's a pubsing I go to every couple weeks, and every so often one of the other singers talks while I'm singing. Actually there's a certain amount of conversation during songs, usually whispered, but this particular guy ... let me give you an example. I was singing Harbors of Home and as I was doing the verse
"It seems like it was yesterday I heard the church bells toll
And the time it goes so slowly as the hours slowly roll
They tell me passing days will surely heal a wounded soul
But my tears would fill the harbors of home..".

...when he called to the waiter across the room, asked for his glass and his wife's to be filled, and then requested a menu "because he wanted to order some food to eat, thank you" ... all in the volume of voice you use to speak to someone 12 feet away. I got rattled and blew the words.

So I've asked him a couple times if he'd not do this while I'm singing, and he says, "Do I do that? I don't remember it. Sure, I'll try not to."(The example happened after the second time I asked him)
Last night he was singing something and forgot a word. I supplied it, and he said "Stop! Don't do that". I clapped my hands over my mouth. Then when he finished, I said "Tell you what. I won't supply your words, and you don't talk while I sing." I think it's the same thing. My filling in the words discombobulated him, made him lose his place.

Well, I hurt his feelings and pissed him off. He told me that after the sing. Now he wants to meet with me and talk because I criticized him in front of his friends and because I keep bringing up this stuff about his talking.

Guys, I need to know what works. Probably my best hope of singing with this man is to NOT TAKE IT PERSONALLY, and let what he does blow on by. I think I make him uncomfortable, so he just doesn't see me (I become invisible). What happened last night will probably make him more uncomfortable and exacerbate the behavior that bugs me. Dang.
But I keep being hurt by this. I think maybe it happens because I'm female, and maybe not as good a singer as he. But it keeps wiping me out. I take it as criticism, whether I want to or not.
Help. How does one cultivate a thicker skin?
Blessings,
Barbara