1. Your worst experiences make the best stories.
2. Newly married men (or newly-shacking-up men) should not leave the toilet seat up. If you do, you will be awakened by screams in the middle of the night. (But the problem goes away after a few weeks.)
3. Remember, at least half the world believes in arranged marriages, and they are prospering just as much as the rest of us.
4. If you can't sleep, don't fight it. Get up and read something.
5. Nearly everyone has a fascinating story to tell, if you ask the right questions.
6. There is no dignified way to die. Whoever you are, death reduces you to a pile of meat.
7. Jobs don't create stress. People create stress. (Corollary: Any job can be stressful if the people around you are assholes.)
8. Every excellent thing became excellent by gradual evolution.
9. People can tolerate your eccentricities more easily if you don't try to explain them.
10. Helping people is admirable, but never try harder to help someone than they are trying to help themselves.