I'll be in town this weekend. If you come by while I'm here, I need lots of help cutting the grass, painting, sponging on, and stuff like that. Feel free to eat whatever I serve you, and that goes for drinks as well. And don't take it amiss if I cuss, because I do that if, for example, I drop a paintbrush on my foot or in some dead leaves.

If you come by when I'm not here, remember that you have twenty seconds to enter the correct 19-digit code into the security system before the house is filled with VX gas. (I used to use flechette rounds, but it damaged the furniture.)