G'day Joe

This version is given by Bill Scott as his father's WW I song … but still ends with the clearly WW II "Lord Gort" stanza.

THE DIGGER'S SONG

He came up to London and straightway he strode
To the Army Headquarters in Horseferry Road,
To see all the bludgers who dodge all the strafe
By getting soft jobs on the Headquarters Staff.
Chorus
Dinky-di, dinky-di,
I am an old Digger and can't tell a lie.

A lousy Lance-Corporal said, 'Pardon me, please.
There's blood on your tunic, there's mud on your sleeve.
You look so disgraceful that people will laugh!'
Said the lousy Lance-Corporal on the Headquarters Staff.
Chorus

The Digger then shot him a murderous glance,
He said, 'I'm just back from the shambles in France,
Where the whizz-bangs are flying and comforts are few,
And brave men are dying for bastards like you.'
Chorus

'We're shelled on the left and we're shelled on the right,
We're bombed all the day and we're bombed all the night.
If something don't happen, and that pretty soon,
There'll be nobody left in the bloody Platoon!'
Chorus

The story was brought to the ears of Lord Gort
Who gave the whole matter a great deal of thought;
Then awarded that Digger a V. C. and two bars
For giving that Corporal a kick in the arse.
Chorus

Notes from The Second Penguin Australian Songbook, (compiled) Bill Scott, Penguin Books Australia, Ringwood, Victoria, 1980:

I first heard this song during the Second World War, sung with great feeling by a soldier of the Sixth Division, who sang it as above, except that instead of using the first and second lines of the second verse, he sang:

The Digger then shot him a murderous look,
He said, 'I'm just back from that place called Tobruk.'

Otherwise the words were the same. It was my father who gave me the original words, composed during the First World War. The tune is 'Villikens And His Dinah', a tune that has picked up words all around the world. The best known set of words in English is probably the American folksong, 'Sweet Betsy From Pike'.

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Here's a second version, with a variant chorus:
Dinky Di

He came over to London and straight away strode,
To army headquarters in Horseferry Road,
To see all the bludgers who dodge all the strafe,
By getting soft jobs on the headquarters staff.
Dinky di, dinky di,
By getting soft jobs on the headquarters staff.

A lousy lance-corporal said, 'Pardon me, please,
You've mud on your tunic and blood on your sleeve,
You look so disgraceful the people will laugh,'
Said the lousy lance-corporal on the headquarters staff.
Dinky di, dinky di,
Said the lousy lance-corporal on the headquarters staff.

The digger then shot him a murderous glance;
He said: 'We're just back from the balls-up in France,
Where bullets are flying and comforts are few,
And brave men are dying for bastards like you;
Dinky di, dinky di,
And brave men are dying for bastards like you.'

'We're shelled on the left and we're shelled on the right,
We're bombed all the day and we're bombed all the night,
And if something don't happen, and that pretty soon,
There'll be nobody left in the bloody platoon;
Dinky di, dinky di,
There'll be nobody left in the bloody platoon.'

This story soon got to the ears of Lord Gort,
Who gave the whole matter a great deal of thought,
He awarded the digger a VC and two bars,
For giving that corporal a kick up the arse;
Dinky di, dinky di,
For giving that corporal a kick up the arse.

This one, differing mainly by the chorus repeating the last line of the verse, was published earlier, by John Lahey in his Great Australian Folk Songs, 1965, Hill of Content Publishing, Melbourne, Victoria. Unfortunately, Lahey gives no collection notes.

This is the exact version anthologised by Thérèse Radic, A Treasury of Favourite Australian Songs, Currey O'Neill Ross, South Yarra, Victoria, 1983 although she cites versions in several other books … "These are only a few of the verses. Most are hilarious but not possible to print, given the obscenity laws."

Regards,

Bob Bolton