I prefer July 5th, or "What da Fah????? Day." July 5th, celibrates the day that the Patriot Fathers and their Mothers, (Brothers etc...) went to the bank and found, to their drunken dismay, that the British had in fact left, and taken their money with them. In a single voice, through 13 colonies one heard "WHAT THE FAH...." (they remembered they were puritans just in time, or there would be a hard sylable at the end of the holiday...) In tears, George Washington led them down to Francis Taveren, which at the time could hold most of the population of the United States, and they cried into their cold water, the Brits having taken all the beer with them as well, and the water wasn't too cold either, as they had not yet invented ice or diet coke - which WAS being drunk over ice by the Indians but had not been discovered by White Folks yet, so it didn't exist. Well, the day was getting wuser and wuser until it occured to George that we needed 1. a President and B. a war. So he told Shey that he was going to make up for the loss of British gold by taking all the farms away from the soldiers who fought for him, shoot anyone who made whiskey without paying tax (they had all these Tea Tax stamps in desk draws...) so it was back to war. After he killed more members of the old Contenental army then Cornwallis (who just wanted to A) Free the slaves, 2. go home and paint petunias anyway) so where was I, Oh yea, the surviors decided it was better to kill Indians than each other, and continued to do so until they invented the car and needed oil for the engines and politician's hair. Along came the Dixie Chicks and the rest is history.
Happy What Da FaHHHH!!!!!???? Day America and the World!