Nigel,

Many years ago I learned a slightly different, longer version of 'Carolina the Cowpunchers' Whore' (It used to be heard belting out of the back of ACF 4 tonners at Annual Camp - Do cadets still travel in/sing from lorries I wonder):


Way down Alabama where the bull-slit lies thick,
Where girls are so pretty that babies come quick.
There in the middle, the queen if it all
Is Carolina, Carolina, the cow punchers' whore.

She's randy, she's handy, she shags in the street.
If ever you meet her, she's always 'on heat'
If you leave your flies open she's after your 'meat'
Carolina, Carolina, the cow punchers' whore.

One day I was riding out, down by the falls,
One hand on my pistol, the other, my balls,
When I saw Carolina a-using a stick
Instead of the end of a cow puncher's prick.

I carressed her, undressed her and laid her down there,
I parted the tresses of curly brown hair,
I inserted the penis of my trusty horse
And then there began such a strange intercourse.

Faster and faster and faster it seemed
'til at length Carolina rejoyced with a scream,
But alas, Carolina, my horse did 'backfire'
And shot poor Carolina straight into the mire.

There lay Carolina, all covered in muck,
She stood up and said "What a glorious F**k",
Took two paces forward, fell dead on the floor,
And that was the end of the cow-puncher's whore.


Any Use?

Walrus