The parrot, Tony Blair, 'as excaped! Me Eddie is very put out about it on account of the bird cost us 250 quid on Ebay! Meself, I count it as blessed relief, due to the fact that we finally 'ave some peace and quiet again. Eddie 'as gone out to put up reward posters wif a picture of the bloody bird on them. I 'ope it is not found. One Tony Blair in England is more than enough, I say. Per'aps it will fly back to Africa or wherever they come from. I pity the people in the tropics wot 'ave to put up wif these screechy vermin on a daily basis.

It 'ad also learnt 'ow to say "Shut yer bleedin' gob!!!" and fings like that, which it learnt by imitating me! We was at daggers drawn. It was comin' down to a question of 'im or me, so I am glad the bastard excaped and 'as gone to find 'is destiny somewhere's else but in my 'ouse!