BAWDY SONG ALERT!!!

This vile song is another from the singing of our old family friend Dennis Puleston from Long Island, NY, as remembered by my mother:


OLD MAID STOOD BY THE FIRE, THE

(From the Singing of Dennis Puleston, circa 1950?s, as remembered by Dahlov Ipcar
Tune: similar to that of "The Good Ship Venus")

The old maid stood by the fire,
The old maid stood by the fire;
There was no one there but the old tom cat
So she lifted her skirts up higher.

Chorus:

She lifted her skirts up higher,
She lifted her skirts up higher;
There was no one there but the old tom cat
So she lifted her skirts up higher.

The cat for a rat did take it,
The cat for a rat did take it;
He made one spring at the hairy thing,
And, by God, how he did shake it! (CHO)

The old maid pissed and farted,
The old maid pissed and farted;
She made such a din that the neighbors rushed in,
And the cat and the quiff were parted. (CHO)

They sent for the famous physician,
They sent for the famous physician;
He said, "Dear me, it is plain to see
He has bit right through the partition." (CHO)

Now ye maids who stand by the fire,
Now ye maids who stand by the fire;
There are much better stunts you can play with your cunts
Than to raise the tom cat's ire. (CHO)

I've found no sign of this song in my searches. It appears to be in grave danger of becoming extinct. Therefore I'm posting it here in the hope that it will strike a responsive chord in some sensitive younger person.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble