Phone rings in a Moscow flat. Vladimir answers it and it's the local car dealer

Car Dealer: Vladimir? I have a delivery date for your new car
Vladimir: Splendid! When can I expect it?
CD: July 14th 2008!
V:   Will that be in the morning or the Afternoon? Because I already have the gas-man coming in the morning!
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Before Gladys Snost & Perry Stroyka - Brezhnev awakes one morning and walks out onto the balcony of his home and watches the sun come up
"Good Morning Comrade!" says the sun, "It will be a nice day!"

"Thank you" says Brezhnev, thinking to himself "How important I must be - Even the sun advises me"

At lunchtime, after a busy morning at the Politburo, Brezhnev steps out into the gardens for a walk

"Good Day Comrade" says the sun, "I trust your lunch was good and you are rested for the work of the afternoon"

"Lunch was fine and I am rested" says Bredzhnev, thinking "Yes! Really important! even the sun is interested in my well-being"

After dinner Brezhnev steps out into the gardens of him Dacha but as he watches the sun set he says,

"Sun! Are you not going to ask me how the rest of my day went"

And the sun replies,

"I'm in the west now - You can f*** off!!"