Dear Mr. Zan,

Please accept my semi-sincere apologies for my ignorance regarding your purported son, "Korak". I must admit to never having read Mr. Burroughs' accounts of your adventures. During my formative years, when many of my schoolmates were immersing their brains in meaningless escapist drivel, I found myself much more inclined toward the writings of Camus, Kafka, Sartre and, lest you should get the impression I think my adolescent reading habits somehow make me superior to those with more plebian tastes, Ayn Rand (shudder!).

Perhaps if I someday find myself undergoing a lengthy period of incarceration and the last book on the trustee's library cart is a Tarzan adventure story I may read it.