I don't think anyone smoked to piss me off, but the NO SMOKING signs were big enough for Mr. McGoo to see.

Years ago I went to a banquet in a room full of people. There were ashtrays on the tables and huge No Smoking signs on all the walls. Well, this blowzy old slattern and her half witted son lit up. Some one told her there was no smoking allowed and she got all huffy, declaring that she paid to get in and saw no reason why she shouldn't smoke. Being unable to keep quiet, I told her that we all paid to get in and the rest of us were not smoking. She, in a loud voice said "Then what the hell are the ashtrays for"? I said "They are for the illiterates who can't read the damn signs." They left.