I could give a turkey about the SPAM but that "Timeless Prose"..............You'd think these assholes would at least get a reasonable translation, namely one that doesn't sound like a translation! Possibly even one that makes sense!!! A few years ago I read on the back of a Christmas Light box:
"Plug In to 110 outlet with plug (2) and Bright Sparkle Ice Lites will some flicker, glimmer and pop."